Hermione's Secrets
by Rowling Writer
Summary: Hermione has a past that she was never willing to tell anyone about, not even her best friends. What happens when she can't keep it a secret anymore. What will they think of her, then.


Hi guys, i decided to drop my other stories. (I felt they weren't up to par.)  
This is already completely thought out, and this is just the beginning chapter.  
I doubt it'll be too long, but I believe it'll be interesting.  
All I ask is your opinion on how it's going so far.  
Don'tbe shy to leave flames, criticisms, good reviews etc.  
Please, i'm trying to get better.

-M.  
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She stared avidly into Harry's eyes hoping she hadn't gone too far but his face showed no emotion. He was dumbfounded by her statement, her eyes flickered over to Ron who was sitting on the couch opposite them, his broken foot resting on a school stool, and his face held a look of bewilderment.

She forced herself to look back at Harry who's face was now painfully shrewd as though it took every muscle in his body to contain himself. He cleared his throat,

"Stop feeling sorry for myself? Stop feeling _sorry_ for myself? _Excuse me, _Hermione, but I think that if _everyone_ who was ever close to you, was _dead_,you would also feel slightly _sorry_ for yourself, don't you think?

She nodded quickly, "I understand that you are upset, but you have been taking it out on me and Ron for too long now and we also have our fair share of problems, Harry."

"I'm so sure." He hissed in their direction "I'm so sure that you even go through half of what I do!" Hermione stood absolutely still, almost as though she was hoping to stare Harry down. And answering in a low calm voice, she said "If only you knew Harry, If only you knew."

His eyes became wide and seemed to tower with rage almost instantly "THEN TELL ME HERMIONE! What's so_ BLOODY _horrible about your life? HUH? SPIT IT OUT, THEN!"

She shook her head, "It's not something I am willing to discuss, I'm just merely asking you to _stop _treating me like it's my fault Dumbledore was killed." "Was _MURDERED!" _Harry roared, gritting his teeth.

"It wasn't our fault, Harry!" Hermione screeched as tears streamed from the corners of her eyes. "So s-stop taking it out on me! PLEASE!"

Choosing to Ignore what she said he raised an eyebrow rudely, "So what is it that's so horrible in your life Hermione? HUH? - Go on, I would love to hear it!"

"It's n-nothing." She stuttered quietly.

"That's exactly what it is, Hermione! Ding Ding Ding,- we have a winner! IT'S NOTHING!" His voice had gotten painfully high at his last word and he stood, now, panting, his face red from yelling but suddenly his shoulders seemed to sag.

"No, wait, that came out wrong, I-I'm sorry." Harry looked up expectantly at Hermione who stood rigid with her hands behind her back staring at the floor, but suddenly, her face shot up. An anger gleamed through her eyes that shocked Harry - and also Ron who was still sitting on the couch watching the fight with the rest of the Gryffindors who had stayed in that Winter holiday.

"No Harry, that came out perfectly right. It's what you have been dying to say isn't it? That my problems, just _don't _matter. But how _ignorant _of you! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY ARE!" Anger seared through her as though it was shot up her arm through a tube.

"Well, I'm no mind reader, so I suggest you tell me!" Harry spat at her.

Hermione stood silent, staring at Harry who was looking back intensely. She new this would come up, one day she would say something that might strike someone's curiosity. Oh, how she hated herself and that big mouth people always told to shut up, at that moment her lack of self control became her worst enemy.

She knew she would have to tell them one day, but that day couldn't be today, no, she wasn't ready! As she stood there, she began to scold herself silently '_You got yourself into this mess! '_

All those nights preparing herself for this moment, to finally tell them, were forgotten. And all those encouraging talks she would give herself washed away without a trace.

How could she possibly explain everything? Her brain began to rack searching for everything she needed to say- suddenly it his her like a slap in the face, Her pensieve. The object that kept all of her forgottenbad memories. But did she want them to see it? Showing this to _anyone _would put her in a vulnerable position. Beyond vulnerable, she would be exploited. Could she risk it?

But what about Harry and Ron who undoubtedly told her _everything, _even the things she didn't necessarily want to know.

She shuddered at the memory of Harry and Ron discussing their penis sizes on the way to a quidditch practice - _WAY TOO MUCH INFORMATION!  
_She thought smirking silently at their foolishness.

She remembered yelling at them for being _inappropriate_.

"Well?" Harry looked over impatiently knocking her out of her thoughts.

She swallowed the lump that had found it's way to her throat. She should tell them, they were her best friends, weren't they?

"Hold on." She said quietly leaving the common room. Her gut was screaming for her to forget this ordeal, but she has been keeping things quiet for much too long. _MUCH TOO LONG._

Upon entering the girl's dormitory she noted random objects lying across the floor stuffed under beds and thrown about dressers. Shrugging the mess off she walked over to her trunk, flipping it open efficiently she threw an assortment of random objects out around her. There at the bottom, under her set of black rain robes lay a silvery bowl holding the memories that she wished never to relive.

She lifted the object carefully studying the silvery surface and deep texture, the very texture which holds her thoughts together by complex magical means. She stood lifting the pensieve with an amazing effort not to tip it over somehow, her heart pumping quicker with each step. They were finally going to know Hermione, the good and the bad.

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Yes, i know it's short but I didn't want to write too much and then have it suck.  
Please review quickly and I'll write **WAY **more.

(I am going to London saturdayand the flight is ten hours long. Why would this interest you?  
I'm bringing my lap-top. You guys will have a story soon enough!)

P.S.  
Can someone explain 'beta or being beta'd' to me? Gosh, I need to learn all these technical terms. P

Love always and forever,  
Your story writing super nova,  
Michelle.


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